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The DMV, United States
I'm young, black, single and fabulous!!! Trying to live my life to the fullest before its all said and done with . I'm just trying to figure it all out!

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Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Bad Girl Gone Good





He told me I've changed, the once wild chick he first met was long gone now, the clubbin" every weekend, sleeping all day girl had taken a step back and turned into who I am today. The not looking for Love heartless chick he once thought he just liked had turned into the the woman he now loved. I didn't say much just sat back and listened to him try and take all the credit for my once "Wild Chick" to who I am today. I wouldn't admit it to him but for ya'll I will, he has been some of the reason for the change ..him and the my old age is setting in and I look at things totally different then the past. He has lighten my heart a bit more, allowed me to be me instead of what I thought he wanted me to be. Ha! its funny now that I look back on the past 10 months I had no plans for my relationship with lil Richmond to continue on and we would be right here right now. I laugh at all the times I tried my hardest to get rid of him and each time he found his way back, maybe he saw that i was just running away like I have a habit on doing. I do think him for be patient with my smart mouth and everything that comes in and between that. I'm not the easiest person to get along with and I know it has been a challenge for him because of that I watched myself change ,watched myself grow a lil bit, its been a long time since i genuinely like a man and not because it was just something to do. I find myself including him in a lot more of me then before allowing him to get to know the real Sunshine and what she is all about.

I knew that i had changed this past weekend when he met my parent *covers eyes* and I thought about telling him about my fertility issues. awww i guess Sunshine is growing up a lil because I never take guys to meet my parents but i did and it went well and they are asking him if he is coming back anytime soon *wipes sweat*..that was half of the change i decided to make the past weekend. I had been debating with myself for awhile its i would ever share my fertility issues with him..I mentally argued with myself alot about it I even go the advice of my friends but none of it seem right to me. So while riding in the car I just blurted it out" I have PCOS".. he didn't respond at first just looked at me. I knew he didn't know what in the hell i was talking about and was waiting for me to complete my sentence. I went on to tell him the who , what when and how of what it is and what it means. It felt good to get it off mu shoulders what i felt sick to my stomach cuz it was the longest pause ever before he responded...i think he was gathering his thoughts..long story short he basically said.. that doesn't change anything that we have going on...if we are meant to be we will be and if we are meant to have children we will...we will worry about that when the times comes if children never come its cool i already got 2.

It went much better than i ever thought...I don't its been a guy in a long time that I wanted to be me with, someone i wanted to see me for who I really am...so if he has changed me i accepted matter of fact I appreciate it....


fyi..I refuse to proofread... I've been trying to write this for a week...I'm over it lol

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Aww that's beautiful. Growth is beautiful. I'm glad you're happy and letting your walls down. They don't do anything but get in the way anyways. He seems like a good guy. You should keep him. Lol.

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

the right person, is the right person.

that person will love you completely. will love, accept, & understand everything.

stop be afraid. stop being scared. be yourself, and let him love you. all of you.

you get an "awwww"..

now *thug dap*..we got an image to uphold.


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