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Monday, June 20, 2011
Don't Do It
We all know I have an love/hate relationships with weddings! I love to see black love but it just reminds me that I'm not there yet. Usually, I'm jealous of whomever is getting married and in my head i'm planning out how my wedding would be so much better but not this most recent time. I sat at the wedding of one of my friends and just wanted to scream DON'T DO IT! PLEASE DON'T DO IT!! but of course I didn't just smiled from ear to ear as we walked down the aisle trying not to bust out laughing at my friend Lyssa as she talked about how this was all bad.
I learned at her bridal shower weeks earlier that things aren't always what they seem, she tried to paint their relationship as all honey drops and sweet smelling flowers but I knew the truth. The truth is this marriage was rushed I mean but into overdrive like over night, in February they had just in engaged, she moved in with him and before I knew it she was on my phone telling me the engagement was off and she was coming back home. I knew that they would get back together but I never thought that would mean that the wedding was back on and moved up a whole two years....smh...two years. We sat around the day before her wedding crossing everything that needed to be done off her list when she dropped the bomb on everyone that he had cheated on her. Everyone looked at her waiting for more but she just continues on playing with her phone...he cheated on you and its no big deal is what left my mouth and with that she said yep..i love him we can't change it so i'm moving on past it. Okay with that being said I just knew it was many moons ago when this happened but to my surprise it was just 3 months ago *huge sigh* no one comments when she laid that out for us, we all just stared off into space. After her house cleared out and it was just 4 of us left she finally opened up about it...but all i heard was blah blah blah...have we learned nothing from Jennifer on #BBW has she not taught us that marrying a man who cheats on you right before the wedding is a bad idea?!? cuz the cheating doesn't stop.
I learned along time ago that I never offer my advice when not asked especially when it comes to cheating s/o. Her last words of the night to us was..."I love this man and his kids with all my heart. It was a one time thing and I can forgive him and move on....and I don't to loss him to anyone else so we getting married..PERIOD" so like any other good friend i supported her decision and watched her jump the broom with so many doubts in my mind. Yes i want her to be happy and all that good stuff i just don't want this to come back and bite her in the ass. I don't wanna see her broken like once before and being lost and confused about the situation. Granted maybe that was the one and only time her cheated on her which i doubt and maybe it will never happen again the risk are just too high.
I watched them say I do and a tear fell from my eye...that tear was not my usually i'm so happy for them i wish it was me...that tear was lawd i hope this works out well.....
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1 comment:
Lawd. I just don't know if I could do it. Marriage is serious business. Why would I put myself through the possibility of this man cheating on me again and now I'm technically stuck with his ass? No way.
Being a friend and knowing the real deal puts you in a sticky situation. I would trust my best friend enough to tell me I have lost my damn mind, whip the car around the corner and we jet off with the honeymoon tickets. Marrying into a lie before God? No way.
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