About Me

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The DMV, United States
I'm young, black, single and fabulous!!! Trying to live my life to the fullest before its all said and done with . I'm just trying to figure it all out!


Tuesday, July 31, 2012


Honeyyyyy..It’s ok to be alone. It’s ok not always be attached…it’s ok to sleep alone at night…it’s ok not to be a part of a couple. Trust me love, it is perfectly ok to be alone. Take time out for yourself, be a singular instead of plural trust me it’s ok. Jumping from relationship to relationship is not a good look for you at all.  You don’t need him to define you or make you stronger I believe you can do it all on your own.  It makes me wonder about you and what is going or has gone on in your life that you have become a relationship jumper. I have watched you meet a man..fall madly in love and move right on in with him., not knowing too much about him. I have wiped your tears and came to the rescue when that same dude changed the locks and put you out. I swore that was awake up call for you but in a drop of a dime you were right back with him. When u finally ended that relationship I was so proud but then in a drop of a dime we were right back at the beginning…this time with a new guy and before I knew it in love u came out your mouth and living with him was the move.  I didn’t bother to voice my opinion because I know you just don’t know what it is like to be alone.  You can’t be happy being a relationship jumper, you can’t be happy with living from boyfriend to boyfriend and thinking the slightest feel you get from him is love. Being interested has that same tingle don’t be confused by it, Love. I am forever your friend but your friend would love for you to do better…loooovvvve for you to do better.  How would you ever know who you are if you are always a part of a team, ride the bench sometimes, take a moment and breathe without sucking in stale air.  Hell, find a hobby besides relationships because to be quite honest you are not very good at those to begin with.  Ride solo for a minute, let the wind blow through your hair and once the ride is over find a man…..but don’t jump too fast back into his home…in his mentions. Define you first ma’am before you define yourself with a man ending the sentence.  I can’t really blame you too much for your way, I know where you come from, you were kind of misguided I just want you to make it better, not being part of a pair before you even know what it is like to be by yourself.  Ma’am you are making yourself way to available to these dudes, you are way too dependent on them, giving up way too much control…..Do you ever have the desire to sleep alone…layin the middle of the bed instead of the left side…Do you want to feel like you are completely on your own, instead of being a dependent and for that much you could’ve stayed at your mama house.

Don’t be the girl who needs a man, be the girl a man needs. 

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Married Men?!?! Why not...

….*sips wine*

HER:  I mean I date them because…well…I date them because I know they are able to commit, clearly because they already have a wife or girlfriend or fiancĂ©.  So I know that he is not a afraid of commitment….

ME: *confused face* what are you talking about ma’am? Commitment.. He aint too committed if he is seeing you in his spare time!!!

HER: *shrugs*

I love her to death, I’m not saying she is a bad person but lawd knows sometimes I wonder who and why she was hit with the stupid stick.  Was she really trying to give me a great argument on why she dates men who already in relationships.  Ma’am really?!?! Now my girl Smarty is not a bad looking chick and matter of fact she is pretty damn cute, has a job, her own place and takes great care of her child so when she makes the bad life choices all I can do is wonder who and why was she hit with the stupid stick, cuz at this moment stupid was jumping out of her pores.  I usually don’t inquire about her dating life because we just can’t agree on it but today I guessed I might have just been bored and wanted to know why.  Why would you put yourself in that situation? Why would you want to be a side piece to a man and not his main and only girl?!?!  I knew this would be an interesting conversation if she didn’t jump into her defensive mode and shut up down like she has a habit of during, her famous line is you just don’t understand and she is right I don’t.  Even after our talk I still didn’t get it…well I understood for my own reasons why she does but not the ones she tried to led me to believe. 

Of course she gave the one reason I knew she would..the sex is good…smdh…
Me: So you can’t get sex with single men? Is that what you are saying?
Her: No, I’m saying that attached men just have more to prove. Single men don’t care they figure hell I’ll just find me another chick who will deal.

I was kind of shocked of the second reason she gave me, because she just isn’t the type I would think would seek this out but….I guess I under estimated her.  The power she feels from the “relationship” is liberating she said…

Her: I control the pace of this relationship, I make the calls, I says what or how things are going to go. The power is amazing I’m sure his girlfriend or whomever doesn’t get the power that I have.

Me: I guess *sigh*

Happiness,we all want it and we seek it out no matter what we will admit to or not but happiness is what we all want in our relationships and Smarty is no different.  I was confused on how being the other woman makes her happy.
Her: our whole relationship is built on MY happiness; he does whatever it takes to keep me happy.  From trips, cash to just quality time he is always on it…..*stares out the window* you know what that brings me back to power….he keeps me happy and my happiness first because he knows I have the power to turn his life upside down if I desired to so.
Me: So basically, he has no choice but to provide you with everything you to ensure your happiness because if not you will make sure he feels how disappointed he is.
Her *sips wine* well if you want to put it like that ..Then ok *shrugs*

Commitment…..She knows he knows how to commit…yep she said that he is not afraid of being with one because he has proved that he can do it…I guess.

Her: He is not afraid of commitment; he clearly knows what it likes to be with one woman. So I know when the time comes that he could be with me….

Me: Oh really?!?! Do you really believe that Smarty? Like really? Commitment? Committed? Ma’am he is not capable of that if he is seeing you!!!! He doesn’t know how to commit, he is clearly living two lives…Is that what you want for yourself….He would never just be about you…ever.

I love Smarty again..to hell and back but this right here made me judge the hell out of her.  I wonder if she lives in her own little world thinking that an already committed man could ever be just with her.  If he is willing to cheat now he will do it again and again again, same script just a different cast.  I just didn’t have the time to debate and listen to her foolish answers so I ended the conversation shorty after she spoke on commitment.  I had heard enough, there is nothing..nothing good about dating a married man.  Karma is a bitch and I’m just about sure it will be biting Smarty right in the ass one day.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Afternoon Delight

Oguchi Onyewu
American Soccer Player

You Need A Thug In Your Life?

I didn’t realize how much I love lil scrappy until I started watching Love And hip Hop Atlanta.  I don’t if its because I love southern men, or I do love a thug from time to time or the fact that I’m a huge hornball.  What I do know is last night’s episode confirmed that I’m in love with him.  So back in the day when I was in love with thugs Scrappy would’ve been the ideal man for me, the sensitive thug type…the type of dude who will put his paws on a dude in a heartbeat but needs you show him so love and affection when he comes home *le sigh* back in m young wild days n I use to live for a thug or two…they were so much fun..lol..And gave me the right amount of aggression that I needed.  But those days faded out and I grew up and knew that was not the life I wanted to live.  I just couldn’t imagine myself still doing hoodrat stuff at 25, or 30 or 35……nor did I want a my future children to be judged when their father shows up to the parent/teacher conference with a tattoo on his face….lol….So I woke up one day and started my rehab process of leaving thugs and their thugs ways alone.  But I do like a man with a little thug in him….a couple of tattoos and on an occasion or tell me to shut the fuck up…smh or as Scrappy would say I wanna put his paw on him…lawddd *fans self*

Lawd let me come back to reality……*deep breath* Scrappy is officially my thug crush and it brings me great joy to know that I will see him for the next couple of Mondays to satisfy my thug love.  Its just something about a street dudes, with pretty teeth, tattoos covering their bodies, a hot temper and a craszy mother that just turns me on!!!  Scrappy has all of that and I think I’m in love!! LOL

Could You?

This came about after watching Love and Hip Hop; Stevie J got his side piece pregnant.  Well, of course me and a couple of my friends had to discuss the show and the question was asked…COULD YOU STAY WITH A MAN WHO GOT ANOTHER CHICK PREGNANT?  All of our answered varied from yes, no, maybe…only if and so on.

Well, once upon a blue moon I did that…I stayed with a boyfriend who had went out and had a baby with another person. *pauses for the gasps* now that is over let me say at the time I thought I was in love, I lived and breathed him, he was everything I thought I wanted in a man until….He dropped this baby bomb on me, well actually he didn’t the other chick called me…we met up and she told me all that I needed to know.  Needless to say I walked away from that convo numb to everything around me.  When I confronted him with my new found information he denied it for a loooonnnngg time and since I was blinded by his “love” I believed him, we never spoke of that baby until the day she came into the world.  He jumped up one night and sprinted to the door and I heard from him 12 hours later when he told me that the baby was his and she had arrived.  I remember sitting at the foot of his bed crying my eyes out and wanting to throw up.  So here I was standing at a crossroad to stay or to go, now back then I just knew he was going to be my husband, I thought my heart only beats for him and because I didn’t want the baby mama to have him I stayed.  That was one of the worst decisions I had ever made in my life.  I spent the next couple of months trying to accept this new baby and the fact that he gone all the time to spend time with this baby.  I thought that I could move from this we could be together I was sadly mistaken, I envied the attention the attention the baby was getting and couldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him.  If he was seeing her, which I found out he continued to see who else was he seeing….oh and that list was long. 

If I could do it all over again…I would have NEVER stayed with him…never ever ever.  What is done in the dark always comes to light and it did for him, once the trust was gone it was nothing left for us..nothing at all.  


Monday, July 2, 2012

Nails of the week...

So there is a story behind this…..We had a huge storm hit the DMV Friday night, while I was getting my nails done…smdh…lights go out but no need to worry my Celeste the best nail tech in the world continued on all by candle light!! Lol…the struggle was so real!

The Weekend....

In Pictures...

Brunch!!!!!! I was in heaven 

 No lights...forget it..we hit the pool

 My Boo...dying laughing at the world hottest roof top paty..105 degrees

US!!!! I love this pic!