HER: I mean I date them because…well…I date them because I know they are able to commit, clearly because they already have a wife or girlfriend or fiancé. So I know that he is not a afraid of commitment….
ME: *confused face* what are you talking about ma’am? Commitment.. He aint too committed if he is seeing you in his spare time!!!
I love her to death, I’m not saying she is a bad person but lawd knows sometimes I wonder who and why she was hit with the stupid stick. Was she really trying to give me a great argument on why she dates men who already in relationships. Ma’am really?!?! Now my girl Smarty is not a bad looking chick and matter of fact she is pretty damn cute, has a job, her own place and takes great care of her child so when she makes the bad life choices all I can do is wonder who and why was she hit with the stupid stick, cuz at this moment stupid was jumping out of her pores. I usually don’t inquire about her dating life because we just can’t agree on it but today I guessed I might have just been bored and wanted to know why. Why would you put yourself in that situation? Why would you want to be a side piece to a man and not his main and only girl?!?! I knew this would be an interesting conversation if she didn’t jump into her defensive mode and shut up down like she has a habit of during, her famous line is you just don’t understand and she is right I don’t. Even after our talk I still didn’t get it…well I understood for my own reasons why she does but not the ones she tried to led me to believe.
Of course she gave the one reason I knew she would..the sex is good…smdh…
Me: So you can’t get sex with single men? Is that what you are saying?
Her: No, I’m saying that attached men just have more to prove. Single men don’t care they figure hell I’ll just find me another chick who will deal.
I was kind of shocked of the second reason she gave me, because she just isn’t the type I would think would seek this out but….I guess I under estimated her. The power she feels from the “relationship” is liberating she said…
Her: I control the pace of this relationship, I make the calls, I says what or how things are going to go. The power is amazing I’m sure his girlfriend or whomever doesn’t get the power that I have.
Me: I guess *sigh*
Happiness,we all want it and we seek it out no matter what we will admit to or not but happiness is what we all want in our relationships and Smarty is no different. I was confused on how being the other woman makes her happy.
Her: our whole relationship is built on MY happiness; he does whatever it takes to keep me happy. From trips, cash to just quality time he is always on it…..*stares out the window* you know what that brings me back to power….he keeps me happy and my happiness first because he knows I have the power to turn his life upside down if I desired to so.
Me: So basically, he has no choice but to provide you with everything you to ensure your happiness because if not you will make sure he feels how disappointed he is.
Her *sips wine* well if you want to put it like that ..Then ok *shrugs*
Commitment…..She knows he knows how to commit…yep she said that he is not afraid of being with one because he has proved that he can do it…I guess.
Her: He is not afraid of commitment; he clearly knows what it likes to be with one woman. So I know when the time comes that he could be with me….
Me: Oh really?!?! Do you really believe that Smarty? Like really? Commitment? Committed? Ma’am he is not capable of that if he is seeing you!!!! He doesn’t know how to commit, he is clearly living two lives…Is that what you want for yourself….He would never just be about you…ever.
I love Smarty again..to hell and back but this right here made me judge the hell out of her. I wonder if she lives in her own little world thinking that an already committed man could ever be just with her. If he is willing to cheat now he will do it again and again again, same script just a different cast. I just didn’t have the time to debate and listen to her foolish answers so I ended the conversation shorty after she spoke on commitment. I had heard enough, there is nothing..nothing good about dating a married man. Karma is a bitch and I’m just about sure it will be biting Smarty right in the ass one day.