30 Day Music Challenge!!!

So since I have absolutly nothing to blog about I decided to steal this challenge from Starrla Monae and I do love her for it cuz I was worried that I was running out of things to say...which is a first...lol.. so here it is

Feel free to play along!

Day 1-Your favorite song

Day 2-Your least favorite song

Day 3-A song that makes you happy

Day 4-A song that makes you sad

Day 5-A song that reminds you of someone

Day 6-A song that reminds you of somewhere

Day 7-A song that reminds you of a certain event

Day 8-A song that you know all the words to

Day 9-A song that you can dance to

Day 10-A song that makes you fall asleep

Day 11 –A song from your favorite band

Day 12-A song from a band you hate

Day 13-A song that is a guilty pleasure

Day 14-A song that no one would expect you to love

Day 15-A song that describes you

Day 16-A song that you used to love but now hate

Day 17-A song that you hear often on the radio

Day 18-A song that you wish you heard on the radio

Day 19-A song from your favorite album

Day 20-A song that you listen to when you're angry

Day 21-A song that you listen to when you're happy

Day 22-A song that you listen to when you're sad

Day 23-A song that you want to play at your wedding

Day 24-A song that you want to play at your funeral

Day 25-A song that makes you laugh

Day 26-A song that you can play on an instrument

Day 27-A song that you wish you can play

Day 28-A song that makes you feel guilty

Day 29-A song from your childhood

Day 30-Your favorite song at this time last year

Sitting with him for the next couple of hours we never spoke one word about what had went down the nigh before it was all water under he bridge now. He couldn't be ok and that was the biggest matter at hand.

The nurse came in whisked him away to get a cat scan, he was still getting extra help to breath from his oxygen mask...I watched him leave that room and thought to myself that if he didn't return back to normal I didn't know what i would do. Of course we fight, yell, and scream at each other...sometimes spend days not talking but I couldn't image me without him...life moving forward without having him to call upon. We would listen my crazy dreams, agree with me when my friends are wrong, tell me some encouraging when I think all is lost. He is the one who makes it all right when it all is going wrong...the sound of his voice still makes me smile and I still smh listening to some his country boy theories. I sat in that hospital room all alone with my closed fighting back a couple of tears, I silently prayed once again that we would out of this hospital and everything would be fine...

Morning jumped at us fast and he was almost back to normal, cracking jokes here and there...flirting with the nurses *side eye* Everyone cooed over him and I just sat back and watched its been years and years since I ever felt anything close to how I feel about him. I know complain about him alot, give him a hard time but in the end he is the one who makes my heart beat fast, the one has showed me what love was. We really didn't say to much to each other while I was there, a couple of rubs of the hand and a are you ok but never too much, even on the car ride home he sat quietly and I drove. I got him together at home and his mother arrived and I knew that was my cue to head back to dc but before I left he grabbed my arm pulled me in close and whispered in my ear "I Love You Too and I just wasn't ready to leave you yet"

The day before I had called it all off, I was just sick of him and sick of it all...I might have said it all out of anger but who cares I need to make a point and this was the only way to get through. After his response to our break up was just an simple"cool" I knew I needed a break.





I spent most of the night getting woke up every 30 mins by this random number..of course I didn't pick up I thought to myself if it was important they would leave a message but around 8am I gave in and answered it. The call was short and straight to the point..."He's in ICU and you need to come down"...I froze for a couple of seconds just knowing I heard the caller wrong...the familiar voice wasn't usual joking self...I could hear the concern in his voice. I didn't have to think twice nor debate all the yelling and the cussing that went down the day before meant nothing to me now, I just needed to get to him. I grabbed the first of everything I saw stffed it in a bag and trying to make this 2 hour trip a hour trip. I couldn't think anything on my ride there but how what we fight over is so stupid not even worth what was going on right now...I was so wrapped up in if he was ok I bit my nail instead of my stomach and craked the hell out of.


When I finally arrived at the hospital I didn't have enough strength to get out of the car....all of the if's started running through my mind I wanted to cry but instead I prayed that this wasn't our last time together that god would grant him a little bit more time. Seeing him barely breathing and chest moving so fast it brought everything into perspective. I loved him and it was no doubt about it and him not being here anymore....

Thanks Starrla!

*clears throat* Big ups to baby jesus and his daddy for making this possible...special shout out to blogger...I owe you one and last and not least to my girl Starrla Monae...we all we got! and to the hood we doing big things now *drops mic*

RULES:

List 7 random things about yourself, pass the award to 15 bloggers

and answer a couple of questions....

7 Random things about me...

I lie to waiters at restaurants and sat i'm allergic to tomatoes

so they won't put them in my food.

I love animal print especially leopard.

Eyeshadow...i got to have it...and some i never even use.

I hate wearing shoes...I drive barefoot during the spring and summer.

I have picked baby names according to whom i think i'm going to marry..lol

I despise brown liquor..remy, henny, i just can't

I hate pop music....and everything about pop music.

Q and A session

Favorite Color: Purple

Favorite Song: Tamia- Move on my heart

Favorite Dessert: Chocolate lava cake

Biggest Pet Peeve: People who bite their nails...yuuck

When You are Upset, You: Cry and drown my sorrows in candy

Your Favorite Pet: Blue tongue skink

Black or white: Black

Biggest Fear: Being Alone for the rest of my life

Best Feature: My boobs!

Everyday Attitude: I hate to ignored..i listen...you listen

What Is Perfection: I'm stealing Starrla's answer True Love

Guilty Pleasure: Cotton Candy Ice cream and sprinkles.

and the award continues on...

So since most of my bloggers are Starrla's i'm going to do a couple of them...

The Notorious ZAG at BIGG BADD WOLF

K. Rock at DON'T BE EXCITED...IT'S JUST ME

Monique at UNSCRIPTED MUSING

Don't Do It

We all know I have an love/hate relationships with weddings! I love to see black love but it just reminds me that I'm not there yet. Usually, I'm jealous of whomever is getting married and in my head i'm planning out how my wedding would be so much better but not this most recent time. I sat at the wedding of one of my friends and just wanted to scream DON'T DO IT! PLEASE DON'T DO IT!! but of course I didn't just smiled from ear to ear as we walked down the aisle trying not to bust out laughing at my friend Lyssa as she talked about how this was all bad.

I learned at her bridal shower weeks earlier that things aren't always what they seem, she tried to paint their relationship as all honey drops and sweet smelling flowers but I knew the truth. The truth is this marriage was rushed I mean but into overdrive like over night, in February they had just in engaged, she moved in with him and before I knew it she was on my phone telling me the engagement was off and she was coming back home. I knew that they would get back together but I never thought that would mean that the wedding was back on and moved up a whole two years....smh...two years. We sat around the day before her wedding crossing everything that needed to be done off her list when she dropped the bomb on everyone that he had cheated on her. Everyone looked at her waiting for more but she just continues on playing with her phone...he cheated on you and its no big deal is what left my mouth and with that she said yep..i love him we can't change it so i'm moving on past it. Okay with that being said I just knew it was many moons ago when this happened but to my surprise it was just 3 months ago *huge sigh* no one comments when she laid that out for us, we all just stared off into space. After her house cleared out and it was just 4 of us left she finally opened up about it...but all i heard was blah blah blah...have we learned nothing from Jennifer on #BBW has she not taught us that marrying a man who cheats on you right before the wedding is a bad idea?!? cuz the cheating doesn't stop.

I learned along time ago that I never offer my advice when not asked especially when it comes to cheating s/o. Her last words of the night to us was..."I love this man and his kids with all my heart. It was a one time thing and I can forgive him and move on....and I don't to loss him to anyone else so we getting married..PERIOD" so like any other good friend i supported her decision and watched her jump the broom with so many doubts in my mind. Yes i want her to be happy and all that good stuff i just don't want this to come back and bite her in the ass. I don't wanna see her broken like once before and being lost and confused about the situation. Granted maybe that was the one and only time her cheated on her which i doubt and maybe it will never happen again the risk are just too high.

I watched them say I do and a tear fell from my eye...that tear was not my usually i'm so happy for them i wish it was me...that tear was lawd i hope this works out well.....

Happy 2nd Birthday Boo!!!

awwww I almost forgot!!! My boo has turned 2 years old!!1 Who would have known that after 2 years I still would be sometimes pouring my heart out and just randomly talking still to this day! I have been a bad blogger lately and not checking in as often as before but I'm working on that!!!

So as a gift to myself or rather my blog I'm going to take questions to be answered! I know there are alot of silent readers and I want to hear from them.....and of course my regulars and my faves.....so don't be shy drop me a question or two and they will become future blogs post....if don't wanna leave them in the comments email them to me...sunshinestar110@gmail.com


and thanks to everyone who keep reading I surly appreciate it!!!

*pops bottles*

let toast to another great year of love, heartache, happiness, sorrow and foolishness that keeps this thing going!

.....

I was cleaning out my email inbox and ran across this poem that one of my friends Darnell Walker wrote. I remember when I first read it I feel in love with and wondered to myself if I will ever run into a man who will feel this way about me…

So here it is..

You Seem Familiar

It’s you
That future I moved out of the left lane for
Removed the durag that blinded my third
Eye for
To see the kids you always wanted
The yard they’d play in
And the boys the girls would bring
Home that I’d hate with all my heart
They grow up so fast
I grew up too slow
But if I had been grown for them
I wouldn’t have been able to grow with
You
It’s you
I covered tattoos for you and replaced
Them with a name tag
Threw out all my book bags
The day after Christmas
The day after the briefcase and the
Blazers
The slacks and car keys
The bike won’t get me to work on time
And this is something worth working for
I wear loafers now
They don’t support my arch but they
Support the structure you’ve designed
My architect of designs withstanding
Understanding rain is necessary and
This building must be strong
This building must be quake proof
And the seeds will have to wait until
The building can prove itself
To you
I’ve planned wars and left the pen on
The table next to the plans hoping
You’d find them and win
I may not be strong enough to fight
But can carry anything you hand me
I’ll cut the cord but you’d be the first to hold her
You’ve got the whole world in your
Hands
That ring wasn’t placed there for vanity
That baby wasn’t placed there for
Weight
I can only move a block at a time
Gentrify this chess board
You came my way fast
Peacefully
It’s you
The queen strong enough to put
My kids in
The beautiful one sitting beside me on
The train
Hello
It’s nice to meet you