Wednesday, September 30, 2009
When I was younger I just wanted Prince Charming to whisk me away on his white horse and live happily ever after. Now I just want Prince Charming to whisk me away in his white Escalade and we just a good week...then a good lifetime....well,if it last that long. Now I haven't thought about my Prince Charming in along while but then I checked the mail yesterday and there it was...A WEDDING INVITATION!!*cue the dramatic music* Weddings always remind me that my Prince Charming has yet to find me. Now if you had asked me 10yrs ago if I thought that I would be single and not any kind of serious relationship at 26yrs old, I would have told you no not at all. Back then I had it all planned out in my head...I would have my degree...be teaching...driving the car i want..be with the man of my dreams and planning a wedding by now. Clearly none of that is what happening right now. My Love life is so uneventful right now! I go out of a couple of dates with men who aren't even worth my time and then I cut them off for more reasons than one and then its right back to the same ole same ole, which I am so bored with right now. When I meet a dude and feel like he has potential to be something more he proves me to be wrong and then its over....back to square one it is. never in a million year I would think that I would be sitting here blogging about having NO PRINCE CHARMING!!! :-( At one point of time I thought maybe I was ME...Maybe it was ME who needed to change something about myself to find a guy worth my while....but i soon realized that changing me wasn't going to change them, and if he can't accept me for who i am...then the hell wit em. I sit at all these damn bridal showers and bachelorette parties with all these happy relationship heffas and wanna pop all of them in the mouf and each and every time they ask the same question from the time before..So when u getting married?...and I have the same response every time...When my million dollar man shows up!...lol..but truth be told he doesn't have to have a million dollars for me to love him..but it would be nice. He just has to be himself and accept me with all my faults and my attitude which can be out of control but I'm working on it.
Sometimes I sit and think make I already missed out on my Prince Charming maybe he was a frog at first and I didn't stick around long enough to find out he was a Price....or maybe he'll in a another city or country waiting for me to move there so he can confess his undying love for me....or maybe he's a different race then me, which is perfectly ok cuz i like brown, yellow, Puerto Rican and Haitian but all the guys I date right now are African American or maybe I lost him to another female who he doesn't know how to tell that he not that into her or sadly I lost him...maybe he died years ago I never got meet him or maybe I did and never got to tell him....Those are things I wonder about since all my friends are in serious relationships!! When is my turn?!?...When will I be happy in a relationship? Because This Last relationship i was in was far from happy! I was Happy when it was over...sorry buddy..better luck next time?...I guess. I know u don't need a man for happiness but It would be nice to have someone to share my happy, sad and mad days with instead always looking for my friends to hear me out. It just would be nice to have a warm body laying next to me at night and not some dude who i want to send away ASAP!! lol... So in the word of my sister form another mother Epitome ...Is it too much to have a big peen male version of me? I'm starting to think it is".